You might have seen the picture already. A middle-aged (*ahem*) man, perched on a
chair made for a five-year-old. In front
of him, an audience of children, focused on the book in his hand, rapt with
attention to the story he’s reading.
This article will give you—with all due respect to Paul Harvey—the rest
of the story.
Like most judges, I have little direct contact with the
children. Sure, I see some of them in the guardianship or neglect/abuse review
hearings. I interview them in the
custody matters. But the kids aren’t at
their best. Most of the time, they’re really
nervous. And who can blame them? They’re either in a courtroom, talking to
some gray-haired guy in a robe, sitting up on the bench, or they’re talking to
the same guy in chambers, giving their input about how they think their custody
should be determined. So, when I get the chance, I like to go and see them in a
setting that’s more comfortable for them:
D.A.R.E. graduations; tours of my courtroom; and career days all give me
an opportunity to talk with children and give the court a human face.
Nikolai’s story is, unfortunately, like a lot of those I see. His mother had an opioid addiction, and his father was not regularly involved in his
life, although there was occasional contact.
Nikolai had lived with his grandparents exclusively since he was eight
months old. Nikolai’s grandparents
became his guardians and, after the parents’ failure to comply with the
guardianship plan, his grandparents filed for and were awarded legal and
physical custody of him in late 2012.
As part of that order, I suspended Nikolai’s mother’s
parenting time, because of her continuing struggles with her addiction, until
further order of the court. We didn’t
hear from Nikolai’s mother again until late 2017, when she filed a motion
seeking to reinstate her parenting time.
Unfortunately, she wasn’t able to comply with the random drug screens
and other requirements I imposed, so her request was dismissed. Nikolai didn’t remember the original custody
hearing, but he knew about the proceedings in 2017.
In March 2018, I got a letter from Nikolai, asking me to
come and read to his class as part of March reading month. According to Nikolai’s grandmother, Nikolai
wanted to meet me because he knew that I was a person who could have an impact
on his life. I agreed, and we set the
date for a few weeks later.
The actual event was relatively brief. I arrived during the Pledge of Allegiance,
attracting the attention of the entire school despite my best efforts to remain
inconspicuous. When they were done, Nikolai
took me to his classroom, where we gathered an audience of about 30 children,
from kindergarten to 3rd grade.
Once I got situated on my chair (to be fair, they did offer me a bigger
chair), we chatted about school and the upcoming Easter break. I’d forgotten – my kids are both in college –
how every one of the children wanted to share his or her thoughts, to be recognized
and participate, so that process took a little longer than I had planned.
I then read the story.
It’s hard to read upside down, but the kids were patient with me. The book was You Are Special by Max Lucado, and it tells the story of a puppet named
Punchinello who was bullied and ostracized by the other puppets. Punchinello gets to meet his maker, who
reaffirms that he is special and unique, which restores Punchinello’s
self-confidence. It is an excellent
book, with themes that obviously resonated with the children. Looking at their faces, intent on the
illustrations and the story, was one of the best experiences I have ever
had. We finished with talking about the
story, with the children sharing their thoughts about the messages in the book and
how they related to their lives.
When we were done, I got a number of spontaneous hugs from
kids, including Nikolai, some follow-up questions about all kinds of subjects,
and a chance to thank the teacher, principal, and Nikolai’s grandmother for the
opportunity.
Feeling rejuvenated, and remembering why I chose this job, I
drove back to hear my domestic relations motion call.
Judge John Tomlinson,
following his election, took the bench in 2007.
He lives in Fort Gratiot, Michigan, with his wife, Ann, and his
daughters, Devin and Jordan, when they stop by on break from college.